There is only one way, and God has comforted me with it yet again today. Only one way to find quiet in your heart when you feel censured by others. Read on, friend.
I’ve been a homeschooling mom for over 20 years. I have chronic health issues. I’ve helped our kids navigate through learning disabilities. I wasn’t married until I was 30. I had our last child when I was 45. I’ve been a pastor’s wife, and in a place of leadership at a large, Christian institution. I’ve got a child with a life-threatening illness that has no cure (yet). Believe me, I’ve been the topic of conversation amongst whisperers and have received many pieces of unsolicited advice.
Here’s the thing. People can be wrong. The heart is deceitful, and our perception is largely myopic (read: up-close). God knows it all, with no “spin” on it–only truth. The Bible says there is safety in a multitude of counselors (so please don’t misunderstand me to be saying you need to be a Lone Ranger Christian)–but one thing you’d better be sure of in those who offer you insight: check it against the unfailing truth of the Word of God. Always, always, always.
Whether advice or opinions are offered because we asked for it, or because someone felt the need to “share”…always place those words alongside scripture. Do the same with your own attitude when you feel you’ve been misunderstood or judged unfairly. God can speak through donkeys…and He may be doing it again. 😉 So if those words come from a source you feel has no “right” to speak up, still ask God if there is any truth in them. And ask Him to help you be honest and objective. If there is, then get it squared away with Him. Then rest.
Open your Bible. Follow the directives of Psalm 119–teach me, lead me, search me, instruct me, guide me. Allow these experiences to build spiritual muscle which makes you strong, instead of building up callouses, which only makes you hard.