So frequently I have the strong facade that says I’ve got everything covered. But often inside there is a little child who is frightened, bewildered or distraught. I think of Anne of Green Gables, and her nervous comment that she was “well in body, though considerably rumpled in spirit.” Doesn’t that often describe us?
One of my favorite CD’s (I’ve posted here several times on it) is “A Quiet Heart” by SoundForth. The titles of its offerings reveal the source of that quietness: As We Read Your Holy Word, Be Still, My Soul, Sometimes a Light Surprises, May the Words of My Mouth, Before the Throne of God Above, I Could Not Do Without Thee, In My Weakness, Holy, Sovereign Lord, We Will Walk in Peace, To the Praise of His Glorious Grace, Make My Life an Alleluia, We Are Not Alone, Only Jesus, He Is Seeking You.
Utter dependence, desperate faith, heart-glad praise, and scripture-centered thinking. Problem is, we frequently desire the peace and quietness without the work of sanctification. We are not transformed into His image because we are bopped on the head with an ethereal magic wand at our conversion. Oh, that it were that easy! There is no instant anything in sanctification, except that our standing before God (our justification, positional sanctification) has been sealed for us. This is a process of growth. Growth often requires exertion, sometimes pain, often sacrifice, always change. To these things, I am routinely resistant. But the peace I desire, the lack of worldly reverberation in my soul, will be attained no other way.
So, I bathe my mind in scripture. I steep my heart in uplifting music. I read transforming things that correct my focus. I seek out a quiet place where I can think, meditate (chew on what I’ve read) and pray and listen. In short, I concentrate on upgrading my want-er.